This type of living lasted for about two years. It slowed after an incident one night. I’d been drinking and three people jumped me and, during the fight, I was sliced through my arm. An ambulance came for me and I was losing so much blood they said if the ambulance had come five minutes later, I could have died.
My parents were at the point where they would no longer help me until I started to get help, but I wasn’t ready yet. I ended up staying with people who used meth since my family wouldn’t come pick me up. I stayed with them several months before I came to the realization that this was not the life I wanted to live. I didn’t want to be this kind of daughter or mother. I found another job and stopped the meth but the alcoholism quickly escalated to more than ever before.
I lived with my boys from hotels to hotels and I eventually got us a place to live but quickly lost it after losing another job. Having nowhere to live, this drove me to drink more. I soon lost my boys, and they were ordered to live with their dad, which was a safe place for them.
I asked God to take me the right direction and in attending Drug & Alcohol Services, I heard about Captive Hearts. And when I learned it was a program that was revolved around God, I knew I wanted to go there.
Since being here, I feel the closest to God that I’ve ever been. I feel my head is finally clear and no longer foggy. I’m not as angry as I used to be and my family is talking to me more and treating me as an adult. I’m surrendered to God’s will and His guiding in my life. It’s because of Him that I have the good things in my life. I get to see my boys every week. I have new friends in my life who don’t use but also love Jesus. Having people around who want to live their life for Him has been an amazing experience, and I’m just excited for the plans God has for my life and the woman He is shaping me to be.